"It's not the best of me that's assembling a back-up plan for you..."
Sample prayers:
1. God, why didn't that job opportunity come through? I prayed a bazillion times, I crossed my fingers and my toes, I even wore my lucky underoos! I haven't worn those since that one time I asked that lifeguard chick out for dinner at The Liver and Lima Beans Shack...and come to think of it, that didn't work out either! What's up with this, God? I thought you had a plan for me?
2. Dear God, I just don't think things are going to work out between us. I mean, how could you do this to me? I thought you lined up Johnny for me, but guess what God? Johnny just dumped me! For Geeky Gertie nonetheless! I don't know what to do, but I'm finding that my prayers are feeling more and more empty.
(Or on a more serious level...)
3. Dear Lord, things are so unbearable right now. You know how much I loved her, why did she have to pass so soon? She was in so much pain up until the end. Why didn't you heal her? I'm starting to think you don't even hear me, or don't care.
There are some common threads in all these prayers, tying us to some of these feelings in some way. I'll be the first to admit I've had my faith in God shaken in the past, pretty recently actually. When the promises we've received from God don't surface right away, when our life-purpose seems to be put on hold, we can get a little distrusting of God. It's almost like that feeling you get when you're a passenger in a car and the car starts crossing the yellow lines. You look over to the driver, but you can't tell if he's sleeping or not because he's got sunglasses on. So with a few more swerves, you've gotta blurt out the obvious question, "Are you awake?!" That's the feeling: distrust.
Given, if you're ever in a car when the driver's checking out, it's not wrong to fear for your life and smack him across the arm. Please, go ahead and do that! But you've gotta understand that in relation to God, something's different here: He's not asleep. Even if the car is headed for the ditch, He's in control. He made the car. He made you. He gets that you are leery and that faith is hard. He understands your cries for help, asking if He's awake. And you know what? If you keep your trust in Him, you'll realize a little further down the road someday just how in-control He was when your faith was shaken the most.
We shouldn't be ashamed of the bumps in our faith road, they actually help pave a better road for the future. Hebrews 11:6 says, "Without faith it is impossible to please God, because anyone who comes to him must believe that He exists and that He rewards those who earnestly seek Him." This verse doesn't imply that God unfairly demands perfection from us, that He commands blind faith like a lemming. Nope, that's not God. What this verse is really saying is that faith is the compass on our journey, keeping us pointed in the right direction.
If we start assembling a back-up plan for God and don't trust Him, our compass is defective and starts pointing all different directions. Then where's the clarity? There is none at all at that point. See, this verse says something else: the compass is pointing us to God's purpose, God's promises, God's "reward" for those who earnestly seek Him, for those who stay the course and stand firm on God's word, on God's character - He is faithful.
Toss your back-up plan! Stay faithful and stand firm on God's promises. Each step you take forward is a step with God's help, guided by the light of His word and the compass of your faith. Parting words from Psalm 145:
You open your hand and satisfy the desires of every living thing.
The Lord is righteous in all his ways and faithful in all he does.
The Lord is near to all who call on him, to all who call on him in truth.
He fulfills the desires of those who fear him;
He hears their cry and saves them.
The Lord watches over all who love him...
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